Getting your "Swag" on

Without a doubt, one of the most popular words in, not only, hip hop culture, but in popular culture is the word "Swagger" or "Swag". Though a precise definition of "swag" is difficult to ascertain, it could be generally defined as: one's personal style or manner in which they carry themselves. It is that unique spark that separates an individual from all the rest.

Some have been able to profit from their swagger while others are still looking for it. Individuals such as Sean "Diddy" Combs, Jay Z, Beyonce', 50 Cent, and others have mesmerized us with their self confidence and charisma and thereby, profiting from their swagger, but, how can you profit from developing your swagger?

How can you not just make an impression, but an impact on those around you? How can you get a complete makeover without spending one red cent? Well, I will show you in just a few quick steps. You got a moment?

It is important for you to realize that not all profit is financial. Some profit is happiness, self confidence, respect from others, a fresh new outlook and perspective, an increase in opportunity, more excitement and a better sense of purpose. By finding and developing your swag, you can achieve all the above and much more.

1. What is your social fingerprint? that spark that makes you different from everyone else. The primary and most important thing is to discover the thing that makes you, you!! What is it that makes you an individual? Is it your, walk, your dress, your personality, your creativity, the way you talk, your talent? Search yourself and find it. I purposely did not include asking others what do they find different about you. Other people can only judge from a limited frame of reference. Most times, they will put you in a box with everyone else. When you find it and KNOW it for yourself, you increase your self confidence and come closer to developing your swag.
2. Be unapologetically YOU. Make people look at you with a Hubble telescope instead of a microscope! Consider Muhammed Ali. He was, arguably, the greatest heavy weight boxing champ of all time. He was said to be "The man you love to hate". Whether you loved or hated him, he never changed. He never apologized for anything he did as it relates to being who he was. His result, He was one of the most famous men that ever lived!! Be you unapologetically. Celebrate your uniqueness!
3. Get over people!! A person can only be what you allow them to be in your mind. At the end of the day, we are all human. Black, white, rich, poor, wrong, right, we are all human beings. Do not concern yourself with the thoughts of people. You will never please everyone. YOU are the ONLY person who has to live with YOU 24/7. You should be the one that you aim to please before anyone. 1/3 of your life you spend sleeping, another 1/3 you spend at work. It is that final 1/3 that you actually live in! Spend that 1/3 with confidence and get the maximum out of it.
4. Change the lens in your mental camera. Enlarge the way you think of yourself! Change your perception of you. You are a great person with value and potential. You live in a time of endless opportunity. You incite excitement and adventure with your presence! Speak well and positive of yourself! Celebrate your own greatness! If you wait for others you will never get a celebration. You must celebrate yourself regardless of the approval of others. If you have applied the second principle, then you are "unapologetically you". Be who you are without reservation, fear, insecurity, or guilt. Be not afraid to think of yourself as a worthy individual. Would President Barak Obama be the president now if he had succumbed to the thoughts of others? You can have an equally great story! Why, because you are the author of your own book.

By doing these things, you will be well on your way to developing that swagger. It is important to note that developing your confidence is not arrogance. Arrogance looks down on others in order to puff itself up. Arrogance thinks highly of itself by lowly of others. Truly great people recognize greatness in others and seek to be around it. Great people associate with other great people. Let your inner greatness shine and it will attract other great people. Allow me to be the first to welcome you to the new you!!

Ladies Rules on How to Get the Guy YOU WANT!

Ladies, I hear many of you say all the time that you never get the kind of guy that you WANT. Then many of you go on to say that you always seem to attract the "losers" or the "crazies" or the "Stalkers" etc..... Well how do you attract the guy that you want?

In the age of many books about how to "think like a man" and so many other things, I am going to give you the quick and dirty about how to do it and save you a lot of money.

1. Check yourself! James Allen very emphatically says in "As A Man Thinketh" that "A man does not attract what he wants, he attracts what he is". First thing, ladies, see what you are. What is your vibe? What kind of energy do you project? Quite possibly, that may be the reason that you don't attract the guy that you want. Learn to project and, more importantly, become confidence, surety, positivity, and grace. By doing this, your positive energy and confidence will begin to be a magnet to men of quality.

2. Enlarge your thoughts. Men have relationships with women that are interesting, intriguing, and intelligent, they will have "relations" with almost any woman. Being able to converse intelligently about fantasy football, the latest "guy flick", UFC fighters, gadgets, and other things cause a guy to yearn for more of your conversation. Mental stimulation is a must for men. Also understanding what a man is into and asking him questions about it is very helpful. Men are attracted to any thing that is attracted to their passion.

3. Dress the part. It is often said that women dress for other women and not for men. That debate could rage on for eternity. What is true about it is that a man doesn't want a relationship with a woman who dresses "slutty" or "trampish". She may get a few glances and a trip to the boudoir but not an introduction to Mom. A man doesn't want HIS woman showing all her goods to every Tom, Dick, and Harry in the street. Being fashion savvy and dressing stylishly are great qualities, in addition, dressing event appropriate and with class are great ways to attract the man that you WANT

4. Less is always more. The less attention you give to a man, the more he will want your attention and will do whatever it takes to get it. Don't "sell" your attention so "cheaply"!! It is a mans nature to be competitive. We are creatures of conquest. A man will work for what he sees value in. If something comes easy to him, ie: sex, attention, catering, gifts etc.... he will take it for granted and will not value it. If he has to work and work hard for it he will appreciate and value it, thereby valuing YOU.

5.Be willing to walk. My mother always says "say what you mean and mean what you say". Do not say "I'm finished with you " just to get back the next day. If a man has behavior that is contradistinctive to what you want, then you must be strong enough to leave. A man will respect a woman that is strong and confident and has self respect. Though some men will "try" you. As a woman you must be willing to walk away and close the door if necessary. When a man understands that you are willing to go to the edge if necessary, he will respect you and will not try to push you to your limit. Respect is the foundation of any successful relationship.